Former “Smallville” star Kristin Kreuk has booked a role on NBC’s new supernatural cop-show pilot “17th Precinct.” Produced by “Battlestar Galactica” showrunner Ron Moore, the series follows a group of police officers in the fictional town of Exelsior as they fight and solve crimes rooted in magic and the paranormal.

Kreuk will play Susan Longstreet, wife to a crime scene expert played by Jaime Bamber (“BSG”). The beautiful 28-year-old Canuck joins a cast that includes hottie Tricia Helfer (“BSG”), Eamonn Walker (Unbreakable), Stockard Channing (Practical Magic), and James Callis (“FlashForward”).

Kreuk, best known for playing Clark Kent’s first crush Lana Lang on The CW’s long-running Superman series “Smallville,” will next be seen opposite Rachael Leigh Cook and Adelaide Clemens in Japanese director Iwai Shunji’s American film debut Vampire.

If you’re tired of the Twilight Saga’s vampire-werewolf-human love triangle and would rather swallow some shotgun candy than watch MTV’s upcoming “Teen Wolf “ soap or director Jonathan Levine’s recently greenlit zombie-romancer Warm Bodies, you’re gonna enjoy the fuck out of Funny or Die’s “Mummy” skit.

Lizzy Caplan (Cloverfield), Adam Scott (Piranha 3-D), and Martin Starr (“Freaks and Geeks”) do a hilarious job of spoofing horror’s ongoing trend of hooking up humans with supernatural lovers in this heartbreaking tale of an adulterous and decomposing mummy’s forbidden love for a “Fleshie.”

Peep it:

While you steal a few minutes away from your shitty, soul-killing job to surf the net in search of hot chicks, masturbating animals, and/or an amazing Groupon offer, “Hellcats” star Aly Michalka is earning obscene amounts of money to prance around in frilly outfits. If you’re lucky enough to have an office window, read no further and jump out.

Michalka, a former Disney Channel star (“Phil of the Future”), scored a surprised hit at the box office earlier this year with her horror film debut The Roommate. Not surprisingly, the sexy 21-year-old up-and-comer is now popping up in various magazines, the latest of which is Zooey.

Peep it … and get back to work, losers:

British actress Natalie Dormer has joined the cast of the ABC mystery pilot “Poe.” The 29-year-old former “Tudors” star will play Celeste, the owner of the newspaper that employs an eccentric writer by the name of Edgar Allan Poe.

Set in 1840’s Boston, the series presents the iconic horror author as a young moonlighting detective with a knack for solving crimes of a macabre nature. Aussie actor Chris Egan (Resident Evil: Extinction) has been tapped to play the famed novelist.

Alex Graves (”Journeyman”) will direct the Warner Bros. produced pilot from a script by TV writer Christopher Hollier. Cameras are set to roll in Toronto on March 14.

Dormer, best known for her portrayal of doomed queen Anne Boleyn on Showtime’s “The Tudors,” will also be seen this summer in Marvel Studios eagerly anticipated Captain America: The First Avenger, opening July 22.

“Dexter” player Jennifer Carpenter has been cast opposite Amanda Seyfried in Summit Entertainment’s new serial killer drama Gone. The film marks Carpenter’s return to big screen horror since her star turns in 2008’s Quarantine and 2005’s The Exorcism of Emily Rose.

Written by Allison Burnett (Untraceable), Gone is Brazilian director Heitor Dhalia’s (Adrift) American film debut and stars Seyfried as a woman who discovers that her sister has been kidnapped by the same man who attempted to murder her two years prior.

Gone is set to shoot in April. Costars include Wes Bentley (Rites of Passage) and Emily Wickersham (I Am Number Four).

Got some news that will give you the hippie hippie shakes! Looks like sex and nudity will be a big part of Junction Films’ soon-to-start-shooting bio-pic Manson Girls. So reveals director Sussana Lo in her interview with stars Taryn Manning (8 Mile) and Monica Keena (Night of the Demons), posted on StayThirtsy.com.

In the interview, Manning and Keena, who play Charles Manson cult followers Sandra Good and Lynette “Squeaky” Fromme, respectively, assure the director that the sex and nudity to be shot in Manson Girls is not gratuitous and will—in all actuality—cure cancer, save whales, and feed a Haitian family of five for three weeks (what? I’m reading between the lines).

Says Manning:

I personally don’t have any issues with sex and nudity in art if its done in a manner which respects the female anatomy and sheds the most beautiful light on the species of the lady. I think the nudity required in Manson Girls is needed to tell an accurate story of how these people lived everyday lives, full of love and open hearts and minds.

Beautiful light has been respectfully shed on Manning’s anatomy many times before, most notably in 2003’s American Civil War drama Cold Mountain and 2005’s pimptastic Hustle & Flow. Keena, however, has managed to pay her rent without dropping trou. Thankfully, it appears that she has chosen Lo’s film to make her nude debut.

Says Keena:

Sex is a necessary part of this story. As is the nudity aspect of it. And no, I don’t think they will be shot in a gratuitous fashion. I’ve never done a sex scene or nudity in a film before, and I’ve always said I never would unless the movie was absolutely brilliant and the story really called for it and was necessary to move the piece along and was not shot in a gratuitous way. So there is your proof.

I don’t know about you folks, but I think Keena is a 100% correct. I always have trouble following a film’s story when there isn’t any nudity to help it move along (usually because I’m thinking ‘where the titties at’ shortly after the opening creds roll).

Monica Keena

Manson Girls follows the lives of eight violent female Charles Manson cult followers. The film costars Heather Matarazzo (Hostel 2), Tania Raymonde (“LOST”), Brit Morgan (“True Blood”), Gillian Zinser (“90210”), Jennifer Landon (“As the World Turns”), Estella Warren (Planet of the Apes), Stella Maeve (“My Super Psycho Sweet 16: Part 2″), Laura Harring (One Missed Call), and Bill Moseley as Charlie Manson.

Manson Girls is slated to start production next month in Los Angeles.

Syfy has announced that former Sports Illustrated swimsuit model Rachel Hunter will put her bikini wearing skills to the test in their new Roger Corman-produced creature-feature Piranhaconda. The 41-year-old stunner will play Thalia, a character the filmmakers tease as a departure from the “good girl” roles Hunter has played in the past.

Piranhaconda revolves around a mutant piranha/anaconda monster out to devour a beachside community. The silly thriller is directed by Jim Wynorski—the man behind Traci Lords 1988 classic sci-fi vehicle Not of This Earth—and costars Michael Madsen (The Bleeding), Diana Terranova (8213 Gacy House), Terri Ivens (“All My Children”), and former Miss USA Shandi Finnessey.

Piranhaconda is set to roll camera this month on the Hawaiian island of Kauai.

Warner Bros. held the premiere for director Catherine Hardwicke’s Red Riding Hood last night at Grauman’s Chinese Theatre in Hollywood, CA. Unfortunately, I could not attend as I was not invited and have yet to get over my fear of black security guards.

Hardwicke was joined at the shindig by star Amanda Seyfried, who—despite showing off some nice gams—disappointed with her decision to wear a magenta origami pleated silk cap-sleeve Lanvin dress (snap!). Also in attendance were costars Gary Oldman, Shiloh Fernandez, Virgina Madsen, and Max Irons.

Other celebs spotted at the event included the very sexy Rebecca De Mornay, who is soon to make a much-welcomed comeback in Darren Lynn Bousman’s Mother’s Day, Twilight’s Nikki Reed, A Nightmare On Elm Street’s Thomas Dekker, and Sucker Punch starlet Emily Browning.

Enjoy the pics:

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The CW has named Meredith Hagner (pictured above) and Lucy Griffiths as the stars of their new coming-of-age, teen zombie apocalypse series “The Awakening.” Griffiths and Hagner will play sisters who realize that their not-so fresh feelings may have something to do with the walking dead around them.

Hagner currently stars on F/X’s soon-to-be KOed boxing drama “Lights Out,” but is best know for her recurring role as cyberchondriac Libby on the USA network’s “Royal Pains” and her two-year stint as Liberty Ciccone on the CBS soap “As the World Turns.”

Griffiths is coming off the BBC’s “Robin Hood” program in which she played Lady Marion of Leaford.

TV veteran David Von Ancken (“The Vampire Diaries”) will direct the pilot episode of “The Awakening” from a script by Bill Laurin and Glenn Davis. Shooting is already underway in Toronto.

Producers Samuel Hadida and Don Carmody (Resident Evil: Afterlife) announced today that production has begun on the long-awaited sequel to their 2006 sleeper hit Silent Hill. Entitled Silent Hill: Revelation, the 3-D film is being shot in Toronto by director Michael J. Basset.

The duo also revealed that Australian actress Adelaide Clemens (pictured above in first SH:R photo), best known for her roles in Wolverine and the indie bloodsucker drama Vampire, will headline the film along with “Game of Thrones” actor Kit Harington.

Carmody says (via press release):

Adelaide is breaking out of the indie world with commercial features such as X-Men and the indie-upcoming Mad Max: Fury Road. She and Kit are emerging young talent, and their chemistry and dynamics make them a brilliant addition to the Silent Hill team.

The original Silent Hill, directed by Christophe Gans and penned by Roger Avary, has earned over $99 million worldwide and over $22 million in U.S. DVD sales. The film starred Aussie actress Radha Mitchell and Sean Bean.

Radha Mitchell made the cut in Clatto’s list of The 20 Hottest Women Working in Horror/Sci-fi Today.