Kids looking to see naked chicks sure do have it easy today. A few of simple clicks and they’ve got a front row seat to bukkakes and gangbangs. Back in my day, things weren’t that easy. Not only was there no free internet porn, but getting around the parental units was a challenge in itself.
Enter Troma Entertainment. The studio’s productions were full of gore and naked girls, but were so campy the folks never once raised an eyebrow. My favorite: 1986’s Class of Nuke’Em High, about a group of high school kids grossly affected by the nuclear power plant located next door to their school.
This week, Troma announced that it had wrapped principal photography on Lloyd Kaufman’s Return to Class of Nuke’Em High, a new sequel written around two lesbian bloggers who find themselves battling a mutant student body. Not only that, there’s a blood-and-boob filled teaser!
Orphanage director Juan Antonio Bayona’s The Impossible is set in Thailand during the 2004 tsunami that wrecked Southeast Asia and stars Naomi Watts and Ewan McGregor as a vacationing married couple separated in the flood.
Early word from those who caught a screening of the film at this year’s Toronto International Film Festival reveals good and bad news. First the bad news: as suspected, schools of sharks do not eat tsunami survivors as the movie’s plot is based on a true story and sharks are pussies in real life.
The good news, however, more than makes up for the lack of maneaters: Watts goes topless. She does so in a scene that is tasteful and rich in raw human emotion… so if you spank it, please, make sure to do so in a respectable manner—and, maybe, make a donation to the Red Cross or something.
Brian de Palma’s Passion, an American remake of the French erotic thriller Love Crime, screened at this year’s Toronto International Film Festival to mostly dreadful reviews. The film, a throw-back to ’80s thrillers, is about a beautiful business woman’s ill-fated manipulation and seduction of her naive protégé.
While there may be some truth to the TIFF reviews that say the film feels dated, critics appear to have missed its one triumph: star Noomi Rapace goes nude and shares a lesbian sex scene with costar Rachel McAdams.
Sure, Rapace can be seen naked in the Swedish film trilogy adaptation of Stieg Larsson’s “Girl with the Dragon Tattoo” books (AKA: “The Millennium Series”), but de Palma reintroduces Rapace to our penises sans mohawk, tattoos and piercings… and for that I say thank you.
Warner Bros. and Alcon Entertainment have released a trailer for writer/director Richard LaGravenese’s Beautiful Creatures. Adapted from the 1985 novel by Kami Garcia and Margaret Stohl, Beautiful Creatures tells the story of two star-crossed lovers who discover dark secrets about their families and town.
Alice Englert (Singularity) and Jack O’Connell (Eden Lake) star as lovers Lena and Ethan. Zoey Deutch (“Ringer”) plays Ethan’s ex Emily Asher and Emily Rossum (“Shameless”) portrays a witch in lingerie (pictured). Jeremy Irons, Viola Davis and Emma Thompson are the film’s old people.
Beautiful Creatures arrives in theaters on Feb. 13, 2013.
Because fantasy does not always involve heaps of frivolous nudity, Clatto is posting today the new trailer for Peter Jackson’s The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey, the first part in the Academy Award winning director’s eagerly anticipated adaptation of J.R.R. Tolkien’s classic tale.
The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey follows hobbit Bilbo Baggins as he sets out on an epic quest to reclaim the lost Dwarf Kingdom of Erebor from the dragon Smaug. Along the way, he meets Gollum and lots of unexpected stuff happens.
Alternate trailer endings can be seen at TheHobbit.com. The film makes it to theaters on Dec. 14.
LD Entertainment has released a trailer for Marcus Dunstan and Patrick Melton’s The Collection, the eagerly anticipated sequel to their 2009 cult hit The Collector. The film stars newcomer Emma Fitzpatrick as a girl abducted from a party by The Collector and taken to an abandoned, but booby-trapped hotel.
Josh Stewart once again reprises his role as ex-con-turned-reluctant-hero Arkin, who is forced to join a group of mercenaries hired by the missing girl’s father—played by Christopher McDonald—to find her. Erin Way (“Alphas”) Johanna Braddy (Paranormal Activity 3) and Navi Rawat (“Numb3rs”) round out the cast.
Katee Sackhoff (“BattlestarGalactica”) is set to join Karen Gillan (“Dr. Who”) in Film District and Intrepid Pictures’ new supernatural thriller Oculus. The film is directed by Mike Flanagan (Absentia), from a script by Flanagan and Jeff Howard, and is slated to go into production in the Fall.
Oculus follows a twenty-something brother and sister (Gillan) duo orphaned as children after the mysterious murder of their parents, of which the brother is charged with by authorities. His sister, however, continues to believe that a haunted antique mirror is truly responsible for their deaths.
Sackhoff will play Gillan’s mother in the film. The project is the latest in a string of genre offerings the 32-year-old has coming down the pike, including Sexy Evil Genius, theLionsgate sequel The Haunting in Georgiaand Vin Diesel’s sci-fi actioner Riddick.
Alliance Films has released a seriously creepy trailer for Blumhouse Productions’ Sinister, a supernatural thriller that stars Ethan Hawke as a true crime novelist who discovers a box of film reels depicting a series of brutal family murders at his new home.
Things only get worse when it becomes apparent that the killer is a member of heavy metal outfit Slipknot… or a something not human. The film is directed by Scott Derrickson and costars Vincent D’Onofrio (Chained), Juliet Rylance (Animal) and James Ransone (“Treme”).
Brandon Cronenberg, son of body horror icon David Cronenberg, is proving to be a chip off the old block with his directorial debut Antiviral, a disturbing thriller about a clinic that offers paying customers the opportunity to be infected with diseases carried by their favorite celebrity crushes.
Hmm. Think I’d pass on that service. I already suffer from exhaustion and alcoholism. That’s all the celebrity illness I can handle.
HBO has released a trailer for he BBC2 network’s Alfred Hitchcock-based tele-pic The Girl, premiering on HBO on Oct. 20. Directed by Julian Jarrold from a script by Gwyneth Hughes, the film examines the iconic filmmaker’s obsessive relationship with Tippi Hedren.
According to Hughes’ research, which includes interviews with a now 81-year-old Hedren and surviving members of Hitchcock’s film crews, Hitchcock grew obsessed with the alluring blonde starlet—then an aspiring fashion model—while taking her under his wing during the making of The Birds and Marnie.
The Girl stars Sienna Miller (G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra) as Hedren, Toby Jones (The Hunger Games) as Hitchcock, Imelda Staunton (Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows) as his wife Alma Hitchcock and Penelope Wilton (Shaun of the Dead) as his assistant Peggy Robertson.
