Jacob Burris, campaign manager for Arkansas Democratic congressional candidate Ken Aden, was the victim of political terrorism this week when he discovered his family’s cat slain and desecrated with the word “liberal” painted on its carcass.

Authorities don’t have any leads in the case, but “Vampire Diaries” heartthrob Ian Somerhalder has vowed to have the culprits caught and brought to justice (that thud you just heard was the sound of millions of panties hitting the ground).

Somerhalder tweets:

IF police do not or will not find party/parties responsible,I will start a PRIVATE INVESTIGATION into the matter. I sure many of you agree. One thing though—before I go into Mystic Fallsland. This kitty killed in Arkansas with LIBERAL scribed on it’s fur. THIS IS NOT OAKY (CONT).

let me know what you think… Lets get to the bottom of it. Whom ever it is should be prosecuted to full extent of law.

While I object to animal cruelty and applaud Somerhalder’s efforts to find the cat murderers, I do hope this serves as a wake up call to all pets harboring a political agenda: Keep your pro-choice and health care reform ideas to yourself!

Seriously, this is why I don’t line my parakeet’s cage with newspaper anymore. Keeps them from getting smart and plotting against me and my government (see AnimalsHateUs).